big dreams.

When you sit down, close your eyes and dream of the life you wish you were living… it’s time to go get the life you really want.

It has been years of jobs that don’t keep me busy, jobs that aren’t challenging and far too many hours scrolling the depressing Facebook feed of what life “could” look like.

Seven years ago I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease. There is a large part of me that will deny that had anything to do with my life as it is today, but there is a tiny small part that on most days I will still not admit it, might have held me back.

I sit at a desk for eight hours a day, five days a week that pays the bills and offers health insurance because those are two very important things in my life. Always will be. I can not change that.

Most days I am exhausted. I come home from a job that bores my brains and I sit on the couch and fall into a trance of the television. (I have a sad addiction to the Hallmark Channel, which could give some therapists a field day.)

When I dream… when I really dream of my life?

Well, that is not how I envision it.

It doesn’t involve so much pouting and so much sitting.

It comes as no coincidence, that I came to this realization on March 19.

In 2005, on this day, the world lost the most fearless woman I have ever known, Mary Eloise Thompson, but I knew her as ‘Grammy’.

She is the reason, I love purple, but allow myself “to find love in other colors” as Grammy handed me a yellow scarf one Christmas. She is the reason I collect turtle figurines, simply because she did, but perhaps we were both a little soft on the inside but forced to have a hard outer shell.

I don’t quite know how to get from where I am to where I want to be, but I invite you to join me along my journey.

Because we all deserve to be living our dreams.